Into The Night 2 or Listening To New Local Music

I end up skipping the Silverlake Lounge and just going to The Satellite.  I also end up solo that night, and that is also taken into account when I make that decision.  It’s just too hard to make such ambitious plans--going to Silverlake Lounge then going to The Satellite--when it’s just you on your own.  Besides I really want to check out what they’ve done to Spaceland and hear what sounds Micah Calabrese’s Younglight have developed.
I get down into Silverlake passing the reservoir at about nine and I find the place for free parking down there.  Don’t believe Yelp you can find free parking down by Satellite without getting a ticket; you just have to park about four blocks from the venue and next to a sketchy park.  You also have to arrive before ten otherwise you won’t find any space on the short strip next to the sketchy park.  Okay if you are faint of heart perhaps it’s best you pay five bucks for valet.
I walk up to the door just as Hexham Head is leaving.  I don’t regret missing their set, from what I sampled they would have just driven me outdoors to smoke anyway.  I finish a cigarette and chat for a spell with the door guy before heading inside.  From what I can tell nothing has changed.  There are small details that jump at me, but there have been no significant renovations.  I had half-expected to walk into the Roxy; I’m glad it’s the same old Spaceland familiar and comfortable.
I queue up to the now well lit and perfectly arranged bar.  They’ve got all the standards, but my eye spots Boddingtons and I know what I’m having.  I take my pint and walk around a bit to try to get a feel for the crowd, but it’s a sparse one and I don’t feel there are any opportunities there for me to start any conversations.  So I retreat to what was once the smoking lounge but is now--I’m not sure what it is now--I’d call it a parlor or sitting room.  There’s just one person there sitting and sharing the space with me; some guy engrossed by something on his laptop(porn).  He doesn’t look up when I take a seat a few feet from him.  
Oh how I remember this room; it used to be so packed in there.  They still have those concave installations on the ceiling.  The kind where you can whisper under one edge of it and be heard by those standing opposite to you.  I remember catching smokes between acts here and it was shoulder to shoulder crowded and now here I am with my choice of seats.  It’s the loneliest VIP room in Los Angeles.  I remember those cool, vinyl chairs they sit pretty low and look like they’ve been busted out of some Pinto or Yugo.  The bar is closed and caged; no one sits at the stools that face it.  I spend this time reminiscing until Wilding have taken the stage.
This was supposed to be Gothic Tropic.  I kinda like the samples I heard from them.  They are not them.  I don’t relish random music.  Too many times I have been burned by some band trying too hard or not trying at all.  I wait for whatever comes next.  When the driving drums and crunchy licks begin I am very pleased.  For the first few songs I am not bothered by the whiny, shrill vocalist.  I don’t think how much more interesting and appropriate a stronger voice would be to accompany the tight music.   wish they had tried some harmonies; that would have made for a stronger vocal without adding new vocals.  These flaws wear on me a little more, but I endure it for the sake of the beautiful music--very much like a popified Joy Division--until the set ends.  Perhaps they solve this in the studio.(I check out their page later and it’s a close call, but I say they are worth listening to and definitely worth catching live for the music alone.)
I’m outside again smoking while the last act gears the stage.  A small crowd begins to form outside.  Some are smoking.  Some have only just arrived just in time to catch Younglight.  I see Wilding’s drummer catching some air.  I tell him how much the music pleased me especially his tight drumming.  He thanks me for the compliment.  When I criticize his vocalist the conversation ends shortly thereafter.  This is why I’ve never been able to make friends with musicians I can’t keep my critical mouth shut.
I end up back inside chilling in the back parlor watching Younglight set up.  I think there’s more left to set up after a drum kit and guitar are done, but soon enough two guys take the stage and start to play.  I’m always intrigued by two piece acts; how can they avoid sounding hollow and dull?  When it works the sound of voice, guitar and drums can fill a room, when it doesn’t the sound just bounces off the walls falling flat.  Younglight does much more than just fill the room; they fill the room with gorgeous, delicious distortion.  This band blew me away.  To be fair Younglight does run with synth.  Purists might turn their noses up at the thought of synths, but I recall the ‘80s and back then it was all synth.  There were a few minor hiccups; they did not affect the quality of the experience.  They were more endearing then anything else.  Micah couldn’t quite accept a slight difference in key; they pushed through that eventually.
Standing there listening to Younglight I am reminded why going out to shows was so enjoyable.  There’s a certain pleasure in being there knowing of the thousands of other people all around me at home watching television; they don’t know what they're missing.  I know I could yell at the top of my lungs about how wonderful the experience is but it wouldn’t help.  After Younglight’s last song ends I head back out into the night resolved to find as much music by Younglight and to put their music in front of everyone--the two people--I know.(Unfortunately I end up being stymied by the fact that Younglight doesn’t have a presence as yet on the Internet.)Despite how unbearable it is to go out to live music alone, I’m comforted by the possibility of catching Shadow Shadow Shade next week at the Satellite or Eastern Conference Champions at the end of February.
So that’s it.  That’s how I find new music.  Pick a day.  Check the venues.  Check the bands.  Enjoy the night.

Capsule Comic Reviews

     About a week ago I went to the library to pick up my books and I received about the tallest stack of comics/graphic novels I could have imagined.  There were enough there for me to hit my limit of books a patron can check out.  That’s never happened to me before.  I guess that’s what happens when you miss a week of going to the library.  So I had all those books and some of them were so good I just had to write about them.  Now I know most comic fans will have heard of these books already or even have read them, but when something is this good a body just has to mention it.

Marvel Universe VS The Punisher
Written by Jonathan Maberry
Art by GORAN PARLOV and Lee Loughridge
Surprisingly this is a zombie comic.  It’s not quite along the lines of The Walking Dead but it does some rather interesting things with superhero tropes that Marvel Zombies never did.  Short plot summary:  

All the superheroes have succumbed to a contagion that turns them all into monstrous cannibals.  The world as we know it ends, and The Punisher is all that’s left to fight the good fight.  He’s alone in this hostile world battling former friends and enemies.  

Maberry really brings out a side of Frank Castle that I haven’t see before.  Sure I know him as the relentless hunter of criminals, but in this book we see how his mission overwhelms him.  He cannot be moved to mercy for any reason.  He has lost all hope and there isn’t any good left in him to even feel despair for losing it.  He has become a machine hunting zombies and even the presence of human survivors does nothing to change him.  This is what happens to people when circumstances allow one’s obsessions to overwhelm them.

Incognito
Written by Ed Brubaker
Art by Sean Phillips
Published by Marvel Comics
I’m sure comic fans have heard of this title, but it’s worth rereading.  I love it when they just plop a reader into a world and situation; it’s challenging to non-fans but to people who read comics regularly everything just makes sense from the beginning.  Superheros...Check.  Supervillains...Check.  Supervillains in witness protection...now that’s what made me pick this title up.  They’re rare but there are supervillain titles out there, so the fact that the protagonist of Incognito is a supervillain isn’t anything special.  
What’s special is Brubaker characterization of  Zack Overkill as a villain.  He’s not at the top of the villain food chain, but even he knows that the losers who live their lives out as normal people are suckers.  Even his acts of heroism are little more than an attempt to find that something special that sets him apart from the rest of us; the actual heroism itself isn’t even gravy.  Simple gratitude from those he saves is just an annoyance that he tries to ignore.  Brubaker has a real character in his head and I hope the library gets a copy of the next installment of Incognito so I can put a hold on that thing and read it.

Paying For It
Chester Brown
Now this title isn’t for just the casual fanboy.  It’s a memoir a la Will Eisner and Harvey Pekar.  Chester Brown has no shame and he’s decided to share his experiences with prostitution with the world.  And for that I am grateful.  Prostitution’s something we all know about and never talk about.  A guy would not dare tell his friends of the lovely hour he spent with a whore.  A girl would not tell her friends about her new job as a prostitute.  Like I said Chester Brown has no shame and he tells a wonderful story anyway.  
This title made me cringe.  From page one where Brown’s girlfriend tells him that she would like to start dating someone else without actually breaking up with him the reader is put on the spot and made to wonder about the expectations we take as a given.  In this situation that when one wants to start dating other people they break up with whoever they’re currently with.  It put me in situations I never imagined I could find myself in and made me squirm.  The closest I’ve ever been to prostitution is on a trip to Amsterdam and even then I just didn’t have it in me to let a strange woman touch me so intimately.  I mean I won’t hug female friends I’ve known for years--I have issues with physical contact--and I’m expected to do something much more personal than a hug with a woman I’ve never even met before?  That’s just me, but the point I’m trying to make is that Chester Brown takes you there.  He makes contact over the phone...and you’re there with him.  He “interacts” with his newfound “friend” and you’re there with him.  It’s a wonderfully well written snapshot into a human life.  
As for the morality of prostitution, Brown makes no attempt to hide the fact that he is very much for the normalization of prostitution.  In the appendix he even imagines a future society where prostitution just falls along the spectrum of human mating habits somewhere to one side of casual anonymous sex.  I’m going to have to disagree with him though.  People have to choose their morals and draw a line in the sand because smart people like Brown can justify all manner of behavior given the occasion to.  Brown is persuasive so very persuasive but I am not convinced.  And despite my own personal feelings on the subject, I can recognize a good story and be objective enough to recommend Paying For It despite its subject matter.  Hey I love Nabokov’s Lolita and I don’t think that makes me a hebephiliac.

Hopeless Savages
Written by Jan Van Meter
Art by Bryan Lee O'Malley,
Christine Norrie, Chynna
Clugston, Jen Van Meter,
Ross Campbell, and Various
I’ve never read a comic book like this before; it was more like watching a television show than reading a comic.  I can imagine Jan Van Meter pitching this show to the producers of Glee or the executives at USA.  “So it’s like a punk rock Partridge family of geniuses.  They’re exceptional people competent and cool.  The kind of people you want to know when you’re in a bind or if you just want to hang out at your local watering hole.”  I would like to believe that they would hear that pitch and read this comic and greenlight the pilot immediately.  Alas this world would never allow it.  This isn’t a book of capes so it won’t be produced.  If it does they’ll mix it up a little bit and call it something else and hope it’ll be good enough for non-fans to understand.  Thank you to the producers of Once Upon A Time and American Horror Story, you do no justice to Fables and Locke and Key.  They even ruined The Walking Dead turning it into x episodes of worrying about a lost little girl instead of a post-apocalyptic struggle for survival.  Thanks AMC!  Regardless I’m hoping someone out there can figure out a way to put this title on the screen without screwing it over too much.
It’s amazing to me how a simple premise “Punk Rock Partridge Family” lends itself to so many various plots.  Meter has some good writing chops; Meter tells each story with brilliant effectiveness.  The opening arc is a basic retelling of the prodigal son with an added kidnapping.  And it works on that level; it’s a mystery these kids are trying to solve to save their parents.  The second arc is a full blown first love story.  It’s strangely sweet watching a precocious punk struggle to find her way into a relationship.  The final arc is a more involved spy drama that one would think would be Brady Bunch absurd but Meter pulls it off.  Even the one shots that retell the meeting and foundation of Zero’s band the Dusted Bunnies tell their story so efficiently and economically and in reverse.
I do not have the words to describe how well told this story is, suffice it to say that considering what a cheap bastard I am I would actually spend money collecting this series.  I haven’t done that in years.
A very short addendum on Meter’s use of language:
So Zero Hopeless-Savage, the main protagonist, has an affliction that makes her make up her own words.  Surprisingly she remains comprehensible to someone with an ear for language and head for context.  Even I enjoy experimenting with words; of late I’m rather taken with the term feckful meaning the opposite of feckless.  This is by no mean an admonishment of Meter’s aesthetic choices.  I’d just like to note that I can be just as incomprehensible by the simple application of archaic terms and usages.  I refer to the above hebephiliac reference as an example.

S.H.I.E.L.D.  Architects of Forever
Written by Jonathan Hickman
Art by Dustin Weaver

Shhh.  Secrets abound.  They can be found in the most unlikely places, but they can be found.  Hickman writes a revisionist superhero book that rivals Marvels, Kingdom Come, and Golden Age.  In truth though Architect of Forever is more like League of Extraordinary Gentlemen and Astro City.  None of the former three tend to explain the world and its secrets the way the latter two do.  As for this book in question the best I can describe it is as a basic primer to esoteric wisdom.  You can’t get away with chakra and kabbalist diagrams and expect no one to remark on it.  I am confounded by the fact that this book actually saw print.  Those guys, the conspiracy theorists, they believe in a global conspiracy that would never allow this book to see the light of day.  It reveals too many principles of Secret Societies and basic hermetic truths.  Yet here it is.  Maybe they’re wrong and Secret Societies aren’t real.  I’ll just go with that on the off chance that Secret Societies are real and they might come across this post despite the fact that no one reads this blog.
Enough of such absurdities, I just want to talk about how cool it is to have Leonardo Da Vinci as a super scientist hero a la Reed Richards.  It’s remarkable to me that it hasn’t been done this way before.  I know.  I know.  It’s been done before but I’m not persuaded that Dan Brown actually exists at all and I’d like to continue with my fantasy.  This is a universe where books like The Da Vinci Code and Angels & Demons never existed.
It’s also really cool that Newton and Tesla are villains.  I love this secret history genre.  I can’t get enough of the possibility that historical events may not have happened the way that we are taught in school.  Tim Powers, if you can excuse Pirates 4--believe me he only wrote the source material(and what source material it is{voodoo + pirates = genius}if you haven’t read it you must)only the producers and writers of the film itself can be blamed for that drivel--for being what it was, revels in the secret history genre.  Frankly it wouldn’t surprise me if Newton and/or Tesla were rat bastards bent on world domination.
This can’t be the same S.H.I.E.L.D. that Nick Fury of Howling Commandos fame commands.  But that same secretive DNA is there.  Hickman remarkably connects so many of the extant plots and conspiracies found in those Agent of Shield books that the mind boggles.  After Hickman connects the Infinity Formula to Alchemy then plugs it into Nostradamus I just have to wonder what else I’ve been missing.  It’s amazing how Hickman connects historical events.  He connects the Gregorian calendar’s lost week to an attack by Galactus.  It’s really cool and I can’t wait to read the next part of this series.

So that’s it.  I’ve read a lot of other stuff this week too and though I liked quite a bit of it like Madame Xanadu and the Star Trek prequel they were not quite as good as these things.  They didn’t make me want to talk about them.

Into The Night or Methods of Finding New Local Music

    So you want to head out into the night in search of new music?  Maybe you go out upon the recommendation of friends or upon hearing something new online; if that’s so then this won’t be for you.  This if for someone who wants to find new music, but doesn’t quite know what to go about it.  I think this method works for all types of music not just the ones I enjoy, but I’ll cede the possibility that it won’t work for all you diehard fans of polka or bluegrass fusion.
    The first thing you do is pick a night.  We live in Los Angeles and you better believe there’s live music out there--live music you’ll want to pay money to hear--playing every night of the week.  I pick Wednesday and we’re off to the races.  After a few years of experience doing this I know my best bet is The Fold.  They’re promoters that do shows across the city most nights of the week and most of the time I’ve found I liked the music they find and promote.  Good old Fold, I can always trust them to put up good shows and bands.
    This is my first hit:

Bowery Beasts
Zig Zags, Planets Around The Sun (Portland, Maine), Woolen Kits
Wed, January 25, 2012
Doors: 8:00 pm / Show: 9:00 pm
Bootleg Bar
$5

I’ve got a bill and a date, so then I check out each act.  Sometimes there are directly links to the bands website usually on MySpace or Facebook, but if not then a quick google search can reveal the band’s page wherever it is.  The Bowery Beasts sound kind of grindy and Joy Divisionish, in fact most of these acts sound alike.  But it’s only 5 bucks and I haven’t been to the venue before.  The fact that it's at a venue I've never been too is appealing.  I would likely check it out despite it being a bit too far into the city than I would normally like.

The Fold gives us another gig for Wednesday:

Fawn Spots
Warm Weather, Holy Roller, Muzz
Wed, January 25, 2012
Doors: 8:00 pm / Show: 9:00 pm
Silverlake Lounge
$8.00

    From song one Rhona, The Fawn Spots blow my mind!  They’ve got a real challenging sound that’s still sort of accessible to the average listener.  Warm Weather has a good sound too; it has shades of Brian Wilson pop harmonies.  I fail to find a page for Holy Roller.  The top link is to a Holy Rollers band out of the DC underground in the early nineties and the next link is to a Holy Rollers band out of New Zealand.  I hate it when bands don’t make it easy for me to find and listen to their music.  It’s bad enough that I have to visit Facebook and Myspace sometimes just to sample tracks, but for a band to not do a search of their own name and ensure that a possible listener can find their samples is just so unprofessional.  Well enough ranting about that, I just hope they’ll be the least bit listenable.  The muzz are garagey.  A fuzzy distorted sound that wouldn’t be surprising to hear out of the early seventies.  They’re not grindy like the Joy Division influenced bands I mentioned earlier.  It’s bluesy more than anything else.

The show is three bucks more than the show at the Bootleg Bar and I’ve been to the Silverlake Lounge many times, but this bill should be good enough.  You can’t really hope to find a perfect bill where all the acts are ones you’re down for.  It’s happened a couple of times to me, and those have been good nights indeed, but you can’t have real high expectations otherwise you’ll always be disappointed.

             If you think this is method too time consuming, consider the fact that I’m listening to these tracks as I’m doing other things.  I’m reading the seventy two page Mega Conspiracy indictment.  It’s just about a streaming video tube site; there’s nothing about the Illuminati in it.  I’m working on this week’s Code Academy lesson.  I’m reading comics and some research documents I’ve been reviewing.  Any time you’re just messing around online you can be listening to new music hoping to find something interesting enough to get you out of the house.

So that’s what The Fold has for Wednesday; time to look at other venues.  Mr. T’s Bowl used to have live music every night.  Apparently these days it only has it Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.  It takes me a couple of tries to find Spaceland’s new name.  It’s Satellite.  I check on Wednesday and load up the music again.  

Gothic Tropic
Younglight (Feat. Michael Feerick of Amusement Parks on Fire and Micah Calabrese of Giant Drag)
$5
Wed 1/25

Now I’m a little torn.  Gothic Tropic is kind of synthy electroish, but it’s still pop music and completely accessible.  However the lead singers distorted voice might wear thin over the course of a set.  Still that’s not what gets me excited.  It the second name on the bill, Younglight.  It namechecks Micah Calabrese of Giant Drag.  I’ve been a fan of them since I caught them at a random house party off Verdugo near Eagle Rock.  I heard them next at Spaceland and thought they were awesome.  I didn’t know they were the same band until I checked my journals and the names matched.  So Micah Calabrese is very tempting.  If I can time it right I can check out both shows.  I leave the Silverlake Lounge after The Fawn Spots and Warm Weather then jet to Satellite.  It’s possible, but I’ll see what happens then.  At this point I’m not sure if I’m heading out there alone or not.

I know it might seem strange that I’ve found music I want to listen so easily and all, but believe me this took some time and effort.  You might think I’m just easy to please, but believe me there have been nights where I’ve wanted to pull my hair out because that one band I couldn’t sample has to play its set before the band I came to see takes the stage.  Plus this isn’t the first time I’ve done it and I know myself and the venues of the area well enough to guess where the bands I might like to see will perform.  You don’t get the see all the work and experience I’ve put into this, but that doesn’t mean it’s hard or anything.  Regardless this bill at The Satellite(formerly Spaceland) sounds good.

I’ve got three options I’m happy with.  I don’t need to dig any deeper.  I don’t have to check out the Troubadour, the Roxy, The House of Blues, or any other venues.  Maybe you should, but I’m happy enough to have my options.  In the next part I’ll review the shows themselves.           

Bartender the Card Game or How You Solve Self Scheduling For Independent Contractors

     These are the rules to a card game I've designed.  If you want the cards themselves leave a comment with an email address and I'll send that to you as soon as possible.




    You are a Bartender!  You are living your dream.  You are the keeper of secrets and mysteries dedicated to ensuring the good times of others, but your Boss is tired of the business and wants to retire.  Before he does he wants to know that he’s leaving the bar in good hands.  Fortunately those good hands are yours; unfortunately your friends won’t just accept that.  Your Boss will pit you against your friends in a contest to determine who has what it takes to run a bar.  If that were it you’d be fine, but your friends are a bunch of backstabbing drama junkies.  Watch your back!  Let the games begin.

Bartender is a card game for 3 to 6 players.

Goals of the Game

There are two primary ways to win the game and one way to lose:

1.  At the end of the week the player with the most GOOD NIGHT tokens wins the game.

2.  At the end of any shift if the player in charge for the night has collected 20 points or more in PATRONs that player wins.

3.  Any player who has collected 2 BAD NIGHT tokens loses the game and is knocked out of the contest.

Some cards may change the rules and conditions of victory, text printed on cards overrules any text found in this rulebook.

Setting up the Game

Take the stack of 99 cards and shuffle and cut them.  Place the GOOD NIGHT and BAD NIGHT tokens in the center of the playing area.  Deal each player 5 cards.  That’s it for set up.

Drafting

A note about drafting:  This drafting method is not designed to leave YOU with the best cards in your hand.  Its purpose is to give you a sense of what cards are available to be played and to give you an idea of how high you should bid during the auction or if you should bid at all.

Each player looks at their 5 cards and chooses one then passes the other 4 cards to the right.  Look at your next 4 cards and choose 1 then pass right.  Do this until you are passed 1 card.  You should have 5 cards.  Take these 5 cards and pass them to the player on your left.  The 5 cards you RECEIVE make up your starting hand.

Auction

Take a good look at your hand and try to remember some of the cards you’ve passed during the draft.  Now try to figure out the lowest bid you can make to win the auction.
The auction starts with the first player to make a bid.  Then bidding passes to the right.  Each player has the opportunity to make a higher offer or pass.  Once all players pass or the highest offer is 20 the SHIFT begins.

Shift

A note about terms:  This game consists of 5 SHIFTs and each SHIFT has 8 HOURs.  SHIFTs are rounds of play that always begin with an auction.  HOURs are a player's turn.

The player who won the auction is the Bartender In Charge (BIC) for the SHIFT.  They are responsible for the SHIFT.  If the bar does well by meeting or exceeding their winning bid they get a GOOD NIGHT token.  If it fares poorly and fails to meet that goal they receive a BAD NIGHT token.  Refer to the Goals of the Game for the consequences of receiving either of these tokens.

The player who won the auction is the Bartender in charge for the SHIFT.  They begin the SHIFT by drawing 2 cards from the top of the BAR deck.  Then they take their first HOUR.
Note this: the only player who draws cards is the BIC.  In order to draw any cards without winning an auction and being the BIC is by playing SCHEME cards or PATRON cards.

Hour

A player’s turn consists of playing a SCHEME card and/or a PATRON card.  A player may choose to play one or both or none.  However if a player fails to play a PATRON card by the end of their HOUR the BIC of the SHIFT may reveal the top 5 cards on top of the BAR deck and chose a single PATRON to enter the BAR.  PATRONs that enter the BAR this way do not trigger the special effects printed on them.  They just enter the BAR and are counted at the end of the shift for the points.
One thing to remember: if a card asks a player to play a PATRON card and that player chooses not to play one then the BIC may reveal the top 5 cards of the BAR deck and choose any one PATRON card to enter the BAR.  Its special abilities and effects do not trigger if a PATRON card enters the BAR in this way.

Scheme cards

SCHEME cards are the various things you can do to help or hinder yourself or your friends.  They draw you cards or make your friends discard cards.  They have special abilities and effects that alter the rules of the game.  When a player plays a SCHEME card during their HOUR it enters the BAR, you do its effect, and it remains in the BAR until the end of the SHIFT.  If there are any questions regarding order of effects--that is if 2 effects are trying to happen at the same time--the BIC will decide how these effects resolve.  At the end of the SHIFT all the SCHEME cards go to BREAKAGE.
to reiterate: if any dispute arises and players cannot find a consensus as to how to apply the rules to a game situation the BIC will decide how play proceeds. Winning the auction is an intentional game mechanic.

Patron cards

PATRON cards represent the people who come into the bar.  The number printed in the upper right hand corner is the value they are worth at the end of the SHIFT.  Some PATRON cards also have effects when they enter the BAR.  As with SCHEME cards PATRONs enter the bar, its effect if any happens and then it remains in the BAR until the end of the SHIFT.  And if there are questions regarding order of effects the BIC will decide how these effects resolve.  At the end of the SHIFT all the PATRON cards go to BREAKAGE.
note on terms: BREAKAGE refers to the discard pile.

After the BIC takes their HOUR play proceeds to the right following the description as outlined above.  And that’s it, each player takes an HOUR until 8 HOURs have been played.  Try to have each player take equal number of turns but if it doesn’t happen don’t fret.  It’s just the way it is.
take note: If at anytime a player has to draw a card but there are no cards left in the BAR deck the BIC shuffles the BREAKAGE offers a cut and that is the new BAR deck.
 

End of the Shift

At the end of the SHIFT the BIC counts out the total value of PATRONs that remain in the BAR.  Don’t forget that some PATRONs value change depending on other PATRONs who may or may not be in the BAR.  Compare this total with the BIC’s winning bid.  If it’s equal to or greater than that number the BIC gets a GOOD NIGHT token.  Otherwise the BIC gets a BAD NIGHT token.  If this is the BIC’s second BAD NIGHT token that player takes a bow and exits the game.
If the BAR is packed and there are 20 or more points worth of PATRONs in the bar then the current BIC wins the game.

And that’s a SHIFT.  Do this four more times.

The Game Ends

At the end of 5 shifts the game ends and the player with the most GOOD NIGHT tokens wins the game.  If there is a tie between 2 players then the player with fewer BAD NIGHT tokens is the winner.  If there is a tie at this point then the first player who can explain exactly what a player could have done to win by making a different decision or making a different play is the winner.  If no one can make this explanation then NO ONE WINS.  Alternatively you may send an email to bartendergameatgmaildotcom explaining the situation and I will decide the outcome of the game.

note to remember: this alternative path to victory is available to anyone including but not limited to players knocked out of the game, players who do not have a GOOD NIGHT token, or even non-player bystanders observing the game.

Things to consider:

Simplifying the game:

Don’t have an auction just set any number to be the goal.  I might say 10 would be cool.
Don’t have the draft just deal out 5 cards.  If any player dislikes their hand they may discard any number of cards from their hand and draw that number of cards.  They may do this only once per game.
   
            Complexifying the game:
Try secret auctions.
Try drawing cards every HOUR.

Customizing the game:

Feel free to make up cards or rules as you please.
Feel free to put your own art on the cards, by hand even.
Feel free to make up tokens that show/track what shift it is or hour it is.
Feel free to make up tokens that have numbers for the auction.
Feel free to drink while playing this game.  I imagine I will come up with a variant that turns it into a full blown drinking game someday, but if you do it first drop me a line at the above email address and fill me in on the rules.

One Last Thing

So that’s it.  These are the rules to Bartender.  If there are issues and disputes take those issues to the BIC.  If there is no BIC then start an auction as quickly as possible.  And you’ll have one.

Occupy The Court or Shooting Crooks In The Face At The L.A. Mall

    I got up this morning thinking I’d spend the day reading; I do have a huge stack of comics from the library and pages of research to get through.  That was the plan until I stumbled on a post on the Patch about a Occupy event Downtown.  I thought “Why not?” and gave it a shot.  Times like this I’d be nervous wondering what to expect of where I’m going, but I’m feeling better these days and I’m actually more concerned about what I’m going to do when my barbershop closes.  This is how I try to manage expectations; I can’t let them get away from me.
    I hop off Temple and walk around unsure of where to go.  The address was Temple and, I thought I’d be able to see it from the street.  I end up following a group of people carrying signs.  Going to a protest follow the people carrying a protest sign; that seemed reasonable.  I get to the end of the block where about ten or so people are standing around a corner.  These are rallyers; I’m not so sure if this is the rally.  If it is, thank God I managed my expectations.  I get to talking to a veteran occupier while we stand around the corner.  Despite doing it “right”--finishing high school then going to college--she’s been out of work for three years.  To add to her situation she has MS and doesn’t have health insurance.  So she’s been through the wringer, and it’s tough to find that good old right wing indignation to the Occupy movement when you meet someone in a situation like that.  All I can do is feel bad silently.
    There’s some confusion as to where the protest is exactly so most of the corner head off down the street.  I head up the street to make sure it’s not there either and when I return the corner is empty.  For a second I wonder if they thought I was a narc or an infiltrator.  Now that would be an awesome job.  Getting paid to get the hippies all riled up would be a dream; busting them would just be gravy.  I think about what to do next and I decide to go to the bank.  I had to do some banking sometime soon anyway.  I take a moment to watch a couple of people play chess before deciding to explore some more.  Maybe I’ll find the rally that way.
    I discover it across from the Los Angeles Mall.  Not quite a hundred people are standing around or sitting in front of a mike they have set up.  They area is taped off clearly defining a space.  We know exactly where we are allowed to go and not go on this piece of Federal property.  A few cops are milling around the fringe of the rally to ensure we don’t cross those lines.  There’s an ABC reporter doing interviews.  She doesn’t stick around the whole day, but there’s a wandering cameraman getting footage who does.

The whole event is rather well organized, but a few details are off.  First there’s the problems earlier about the event’s location.  Apparently there was an initial attempt to have the rally at a different place; the organizers failed to get the permits and were forced to move.  It would have been an easy fix to have someone at both locations moving people along to the right one, but no one had the foresight beforehand or the thought afterward to make that call.  I know it’s just the small stuff.  I finish a cigarette and I look for a trash can, but I can’t find one.  I wander about the area and there’s none to be seen.  The nearest one is around the corner by a bus stop.  I ask an organizer about it and he’s not the least bit embarrassed by the oversight.  He tells me something about a food tent that will be set up shortly; they’ll have trash bags.  No one sets anything up a tent and trash just sort of collects wherever it ends up.  Now I don’t want to pick, but it would have been easy enough to take any empty bag call it a trash bag and there it is.  It’s silly I know, but I don’t imagine a Republican forgetting about the trash.  Then there’s a girl running a timeline on court decisions regard the personhood of corporations.  It’s not bad, but when I get to the end I ask the girl if she has a copy of the decision in question on her.  Surprisingly she doesn’t.  The whole event is about Citizens United v. Federal Election Commission and no one has the presence of mind to bring a copy of that decision along with them?  I know it’s all on the internet these days but please if this was a high school project you’d get points off for forgetting something that important.  Anyway kudos to the organizers.  I know how difficult an event like that is to put together and I hope everyone appreciates the effort required to make it happen.

    The speakers start and I’m hearing something a little strange.  It’s the voice of dissent I think.  Unfortunately it’s the same voice of dissent I hear when talking with anti-abortion activists.  I imagine it is the same voice of dissent you’d have heard talking with anti-integrationists.  It’s the same old saw: “The Supreme Court cannot make that decision.  It’s supposed to be passive not active.  It’s supposed to take a strict interpretation of the Constitution.  It can’t be allowed to make those decisions for the rest of us.”  The same arguments completely different issues.  The absurdity is delicious.
    There are a bunch of messages being transmitted here.  There are too many messages being transmitted for me to keep up with.  All manner of banners some small and some large.  There are few that look well made and some others that are just plain bad.  My nephew who’s just started grade school could have done better work.  Despite the number of messages I still get it.  All of them share the same anti-corporate, pro-labor, and pro-equality feeling to them.  The best of the bunch is a series of print repros of ink on paper that look good enough to be etchings.  They’re done by ken allan jones.  Full and rich with symbolism and meaning, they’re far more effective than that quirky girl wearing a sign around her pretty neck that says corporations...not equal...people.  I can dig the math but I’m disappointed by the lack of effort.

The first speaker ends his talk by calling me and my party evildoers.  I guess that’s okay.  I tend to think the other side’s full of idiots, but I know I’m not serious.  I’m chatting with a gray haired guy and he seems reasonable.  I ask him if that sort of language doesn’t get in the way of a real discussion.  He looks at me funny and I clarify.  I say that calling us evildoers is about as bad as calling us “baby eating cannibals”.  To this he enthusiastically agrees we are all “baby eating cannibals”.  I can only hope he was being “ironic”.

I can’t help but notice, except for a few exceptions, that listening to these speakers is a lot like going to church, but instead of Amen or hallelujah they respond with “We the People”.  It doesn’t have the militant punch of “Power to the People” but it’s fine.  It’s like going to church but without the snazzy Filipino choir.  There’s a speaker saying quite a lot of things but there’s no real discussion.  I make a few attempts to start a dialogue with other attendees and it just gets bogged down by emotion, righteous anger.  I don’t agree with many things this rally represents but I do have the feeling that there’s something fundamentally wrong in this country.  Ideologically I am so far apart from this crowd I might as well be from Orange County, but I recognize that the only way we’ll find a solution to the problems this country faces is to sit down and talk it out.  Maybe I’m wrong but my impression of this movement makes me think it has no place for me if I don’t believe exactly what they believe.  Maybe that’s the way it should be, but I’m pretty sure that’s not going to cut it.  We have enough politicians in Washington fighting for scraps and forgetting who elected them; we can’t let ourselves become a mirror to that.  Or maybe it’s the other way around and they are just a mirror of us and all those Washington bureaucrats are behaving exactly the way we mean them to.  For the love of God, if we can’t have a reasonable discussion about politics over a meal or a drink, should we expect our elected representatives to be better?

I take a break while someone talks about urban farming.  I don’t imagine that they’ll be talking about vertical farms; I figure it’ll be all about local grown farming and urban gardening.  The topic is interesting, but my bladder is full.  The nearest bathroom is at the Los Angeles Mall.  It’s the worst mall in the city.  It’s so bad that teens don’t hang out there.  I’m grateful it at least has a food court and I get to use the bathroom.  On the way out I notice a set of four coin-op games.  They have Super Streetfighter Alpha--I was never too good at it and hence never a fan of it--and they have Lethal Enforcers.  Now that’s a game I remember playing the hell out of back in the late 90s at that Glendale arcade off Brand the one that’s still open.  I might as well take a real break and shoot some criminals in the face.  It’s a fun and absurd way to pass the time in the heart of our city playing Lethal Enforcers.  It’s the high point of the day.

    I get back to the rally and nothing is going on.  I try to ask some of the people who are sitting and waiting.  I try to ask them if there will be more speakers.  It feels like I’ve made a faux pas of some kind daring to ask a question of some random people.  I give that up and head to the stage where there are a couple of people fussing with a coffin.  The gray haired guy is there and I ask him about what’s going on; thankfully he answers and tells me that the rally is on a break.  I get to talking with one of the people fussing with the red, white, and blue coffin next to the stage.  It’s for the death of Uncle Sam procession they’re having tomorrow out on the Westside.  It sounds like a interesting event, but it’s at ten thirty in the morning and I’m not too sure if I’m about that.  We talk about the mask they put on the dummy.  Apparently you can’t find an Uncle Sam mask off the shelf.  They had to take a generic old man’s mask and mod it out.  They did a rather good job with it taking hair from back of the mask to give the mask its goatee and sideburns.
    I move on to the back area and have a cigarette.  There I finally have an interesting conversation with a young man about a lot of things.  Eventually we get to talking about the issues at hand.  It’s the kind of back and forth two way street discussion people should be having.  I explained to him my values and fears and he talked about his.  We talked about the feeling that something was wrong with America and when I told me how I could find no solutions he had some suggestions.  We talked about some of the communities around this country that are experimenting with currency and printing their own.  And we had an actual discussion about the feasibility of bartering in today’s economy.  I’m not so sure of the effectiveness of these solutions but I’d be willing to study them and investigate them.
    When the speakers start up again I make the mistake of sitting to listen.  It’s a lecture about the history of corporations that starts with their origins in Europe.  It’s fine for the most part but I stop in my tracks when she suggests that our Founding Fathers left England to escape the tyranny of the evil...British East India Company.  When she says this I look around to see if anyone else is having as bad a reaction to that as I am, but everyone else is okay with it.  I’ve had enough so I leave.  On the way out I take note of a cute little dog; it’s got a sweater on it.  The little dog’s a yipper and a jumper full of energy and spirit.  And as I’m heading out to my bus stop this little dog’s just starting to run around frantically and crazily chasing its tail.  In circles it spins around and around I wonder if it knows that it’s even doing that.  Even if it realizes that it’s running in circles does it think that it’s actually accomplishing something?  Then I get to the bus stop and hop the bus back home.

Smash or Not Quite Glee w/a Casting Couch

    If only to keep the Glee kids employed sometime in the future I hope Smash sticks around a couple of seasons.  Still I wasn’t sure how much I would enjoy this show.  Sure I’m a fan of Glee but when the singing wears I can look out the window awhile and wait for the singing to stop and the drama to start.  I was expecting Fame and pleased to note how little time I spent looking out the window.
    This is an all around solid show in the same vein as Studio 60 and Slings and Arrows(recognizes he’s name dropping a show canceled before its second season and a Canadian dramedy that Americans didn’t watch) It’s a behind the scenes look at how Broadway works.  Where’s Mickey Rooney (checks to see if Mickey Rooney is dead planned reference might be in poor taste if he is.  forgets especially profane Mickey Rooney reference.  proceeds with standard Mickey Rooney reference) and the Barn when you need him.  I’m still waiting for that special episode of Glee where they perform the songs of the Little Rascals and Friends. (realizes you’re on the internet and you can search these references.  proceeds to drop the obscure reference bomb)  “Love Bug” gots some legs for an obscure song no one’s heard of, but Barber of Seville would likely be completely lost to the smartphone and tablet generation.  Ostensibly about the nuts and bolts of Broadway we get to watch how something like Miss Saigon is staged from initial idea to debut performance.
    We have Debra Messing and Some Guy(decides not to find out name of Some Guy and others. insists you focus on two more memorable names); they are the creative force behind the future phenomon Marilyn.  Yeah it’s lite and I really would rather watch a Bugsy Malone revival before shelling out a hundy to watch a live musical about Marilyn Monroe, but that’s the premise.  Thankfully Debra Messing is not the shrill idiot I remember from Will&Grace and Ned&Stacy.  We get the movie Debra Messing who is a bright and vibrant actress who despite having impeccable comic timing doesn’t have to spout one liner after one liner; I’m excited she gets to play smart for a change.  From a suggestion to a song the episode progresses where we meet the money.
    Anjelica Huston is a treasure and it is a crime that she isn’t forced to slave on network television for our amusement.  She snaps into her first scene like a shark and owns every moment she’s onscreen.  I might say something like she steals the show but she’s no child or animated character.  A professional actor can gracefully allow others to share their scenes without upstaging anyone.  This she does without any apparent effort.  The rest of the cast is adequate but I’m not going to ask too see more from Some English Guy when I can have Huston or Messing paint pictures in my mind.
    Given that this show’s got some things going for it let’s talk about the central problem of this effort.  It’s simple and fundamental and it can’t be fixed.  If it gets picked up for next season it’s going to need about 23 episodes for a season.  This show has great veteran actors good enough that we’ll watch them eating sandwiches for a while if the writers need some filler, but I can’t see this going that long.  How many episodes of Messing and Huston casting Marilyn will we want to watch?  I can say four but that’s only because the two actresses  vying for that role Some Blonde American and Brunette Ingenue are amazing singers and they’re easy on the eyes to boot.  If you like the unpfront ample and backside beeping Some Blonde American will do it for you.  If you’d like to watch fresh eyed innocence slowly corrupt to fame, Brunette Ingenue has that covered.  But how many episodes of this can we watch?  I hate having to sit through at least 3 filler shows on Glee before they get to Sectionals.  It’s not working on that fundamental level and there isn’t an easy fix to it.  I’m half a mind to hope that this show doesn’t get picked up for a full season.  I’d rather see 12 episodes as a midseason replacement next year.  Or the better idea would be to split the season in half and do one in Spring and one in Fall/Winter.  I love the idea of Smash doing a hip hop revival of White Christmas/Holiday Inn.  Granted there are some writing fixes.  Introduce a new character here or there, that’s at least two episodes done; if the guest actor is big enough schedule that arc for sweeps week.  You can extend it further by including plots that take place after the show opens.  You can throw wrenches at them; every wrench is an episode but after a couple of them we’re going to wise up to it.  And these writing fixes basically disembowel the elegance of the show itself.  It’s about a Broadway show from idea to stage.  It’s a very simple premise that deserves perfect execution.  That said I have hopes for this show; but then I had hopes for the Lakers Dream Team of Kobe, Shaq, and Malone.  Three Hall of Famers questing for a title only to fail due to fundamental personality differences.  Let’s hope Smash figures out a more effective solution than Phil Jackson did.