i wrote a series of jokes

I always wanted to host a comedy night. Such power. You first then you. Not you. Hahaha. But really all i want to do is play a game I call put weird stuff in front of comics and let's see what happens. Of course that won't sell. I'd have to call it something like Essentially Worthless.

I'd put on the flyer that everybody has to bring the most interesting thing they can find that is essentially worthless. Some thing like you'd find on the street and think wouldn't the first person who leaves just love to own this. I'm talking something like an eight track tape found by the side of a railroad track. Or just some eight track tape that's just knotted up funny.

It could be something new like a hello kitty USB drive you got from a friend in Chinese intelligence who just can't wait for you to open the funny video of his dog and the malware he needs installed to spare his family any more suffering. So like i said something essentially worthless.

Some people bring weird things and I'll look them over and none of them will be good enough. So I'll put a ripe tomato on a table where the comic can see it. Maybe someone when they're not laughing they'll pick it up toss it from hand to hand. Maybe they'll pretend to throw it. I'd guess that depending on the comic it would actually be thrown at anyone maybe one out of ten times on average. Over four weeks in December it's a negligible risk.

The next week when everyone's expecting thrown fruit. I'll put out an oversized hourglass. The sand running from top to bottom. I'll tell the people sitting next to it they can flip it over when it runs down. I can just see the look on that comic's face; like I'm just trying to tell jokes here why are you doing this to me? over and over again on the next ones too. And all I can say in response is Happy Holidays.